systemd announces new version that is totally not an entire Operating System wink wink
Guatemala City, Guatemala -- The systemd project, the popular initialization script for Linux systems, has announced some new features of the upcoming version 250 of systemd. Those features include "systemd kernel", "systemd display manager", and "systemd desktop environment".
"But it's not an entire Operating System," stated systemd creator, Lennart Poettering. "We are strictly adhering to the UNIX philosophy of doing one thing and doing it well. That one thing simply happens now includes a kernel, a display manager, and a full desktop environment. Oh, and an office suite. Did I forget to add that to the release notes? We have a systemd office suite now."
The full binary distribution of systemd -- which, as noted, is definitely not an Operating System -- takes up approximately 2.3 GB of storage, and comes with drivers for most hardware devices, multiple file system options, and a beta version of the systemd web browser. To make installation of systemd easier, the project is including a live-boot thumb drive image of the not-an-Operating System.
"This really doesn't change our plans," wrote Angus McArch, founder of Arch Linux. "We made systemd a hard dependency of Pacman, the Arch package manager, way back in 2013. Besides, this makes things so much easier for our package maintainers. We can just ditch every package in the Arch User Repository and replace it with systemd. Boom. Doneskies. By the way, I use Arch."
"Ditto for us," stated Debian Project Leader, Terrence Waffle.
Linus Torvalds, creator of Linux, is reported to have heard the news while sitting at his kitchen table, the room around him engulfed in flames. "This is fine," he said as he stared, blankly, into the abyss.